Ramstein Underground
heart and soul of our community
Login - Create Account - Help
Clean out your garage on Ramstein bookoo! Or find local garage sales on Yard Sale Search.com
PCSing? Win the lottery? Explore homes near Ramstein/KMC courtesy of Remilitary.com!

POLL: Leaving a child at home alone

who's talking here?

Mojo 4
Fran 1
anne 1
Rachel 2
Kristen 8
CMS 3
Charity 1
Blueser oO 2
MAD4EUROPE 2
Milly 1
lovinmelife 5
a3569571uu 1

     » send to friend     » save in my favorites

POLL: Leaving a child at home alone

would you leave your child at home alone on your own judgement even if you felt others would not approve of it?

no, no way, I am afraid of others Vote
 
 9.5% (2)
yes and I would fully admit it Vote
 
 71.4% (15)
yes but I would not tell them Vote
 
 19.0% (4)
Kristen --- 11 years ago -

would you leave your child at home alone on your own judgement even if you felt others would not approve of it? 

anne --- 11 years ago -

well as im a nanny it depends on the age of the child i mean a toddler or younger theres no way but say a 12 year old i wouldnt have a problem but it also depends on how mature the child is . 

Kristen --- 11 years ago -

I was babysitting for neighbor kids when I was 9-10, I am now questioning why we don't trust our own kids 

lovinmelife --- 11 years ago -

I dont think it is about not trusting our own kids really I just think times and society have changed. I personally would never leave my child alone under 11 annd then only if they child was mature enough. Too many unforseen things can happen and 9 out of 10 kids are not able to handle them at young ages such as , a break in, fire in the home, an injury to themself or a sibbling younger ect.. I was babysitting up to 5 kids in my neighbor hood on Ft Bragg when I was 10-12 now as a parent I think it is nuts. I also used to be able to go into homes with kids my parents didnt know, play outside for hours without checking in until streetlights came on but in those days there was a lot less creeps running around. I do trust my children but I also know with age comes the ablity to react correctly in dangerous situations. 

Fran --- 11 years ago -

It totally depends on the situation and the child, IMO. Some kids are super mature and reasonable at 10, and some, well, aren´t lol. My mother left me at home once when I was around 9 or 10, and I fell asleep while watching Baywatch (you KNOW you loved David in the 90s too, don´t front), and she had to call a locksmith to open the door, because I was a good child and locked the door from the inside and left the key in the lock lol. I don´t think I was left unsupervised for a loooong while after that.
Either way, I would NEVER make it dependent on what other people think of it. I mean, it´s not like they used to wipe your kid´s poop off their butts, so... 

CMS --- 11 years ago -

I would not leave him alone until he was old enough to do so responsibly. That being said, I would not care what someone thought about it. 

Kristen --- 11 years ago -

but there are not more creeps running around then there were, and now there are national databases that let us know about them.......

and I don't know how they will learn if they are not let to experience things

what are the chances of your house catching on fire and your child not getting out? they are in more danger of carpal tunnel from video games or obesity probably in this day and age

I agree Fran/CMS, and here, thankfully, the neighbors are not all in each others' business like they are in America--well, maybe they are nosey but I cannot see anyone 'calling in' someone for letting their kid have some responsiblity........... 

lovinmelife --- 11 years ago -

what are the chances of your house catching on fire and your child not getting out?......

Chances are real good...

my nephew who was left alone ( he was 10 ) while he parents ran his sister to a softball game he stayed home sick...they had grilled earlier and something caused the propane tank blow up and exploded into the house, into the living room near a gas firplace that also exploded my nephew was trapped upstairs I am guessing to scared to come down toward the fire. he died in his room alone. So I DO know these things happen.

I also disagree we do know there are more creep now than before or at least more getting caught,more kidnapping, more rapes agaisnt children. And only about half are registered so that means the other half is lerking. There are plenty of ways to teach our children about life with out putting them in danger. Each child is diff and each parent will choose waht is right for their child. Once you pick dont worry about what others thing. Keept in mind on base at least there are leagal ages to leave your child alone. 

CMS --- 11 years ago -

Kristen... you should look into a case that happened in Houston, Texas. A woman had to run down to Target to pick up a few things. She left the kids in her daycare alone (it was naptime), and a fire started. 4 kids died, a few others were injured. While the investigators were getting their stuff together she escaped the country and went to Nigeria. Things happen. Her name is Jessica Tata if you want to look up the story. So sad for all of those other parents. 

Rachel --- 11 years ago -

Crime is down now from the nineties (when I was a kid). It is not an opinion; it's a fact. It is as 'safe' now as it was in the 70s. We just hear about stuff more so it SEEMS so much more dangerous.

For those who cited specific stories, those are very tragic and sad. But of course bad things happen. That is where the ONE-in-a-whatever comes from. Our parents didn't have the internet, RU, or 24 hour news stations to get all this information from. Though it is super scary, the chances of stranger abduction, for example, are still VERY slim. 

Kristen --- 11 years ago -

Crime is down now from the nineties (when I was a kid). It is not an opinion; it's a fact. It is as 'safe' now as it was in the 70s. We just hear about stuff more so it SEEMS so much more dangerous.

For those who cited specific stories, those are very tragic and sad. But of course bad things happen. That is where the ONE-in-a-whatever comes from. Our parents didn't have the internet, RU, or 24 hour news stations to get all this information from. Though it is super scary, the chances of stranger abduction, for example, are still VERY slim.



Werd

and it is not that I don't care about my kid, not at all...........but how will he learn to be as self sufficient and gain the confidence I have and have had if I don't let him? You cannot wait till they are 18 and then dump it all on them.............that is why these teenagers and college students and young adults these days are so crazy

I know kids in their late teens and early 20's who cannot even cook............who CANNOT EVEN COOK.........unless it is out of a box, and that is still a stretch. They cannot follow a recipe.

If you told them to go compare shop for this or that, they would be baffled. If you told them to find the best deal on a car (and gasp, work for the money to pay for it) they would crawl into the corner and sit in a ball and rot crying.

There are not many real jobs even available for kids these days in their teens except for watching someone else's brats. I am not saying that is not hard (it is) but what about a REAL job?

I really have had an eye opener lately. 

Kristen --- 11 years ago -

my nephew who was left alone ( he was 10 ) while he parents ran his sister to a softball game he stayed home sick...they had grilled earlier and something caused the propane tank blow up and exploded into the house, into the living room near a gas firplace that also exploded my nephew was trapped upstairs I am guessing to scared to come down toward the fire. he died in his room alone. So I DO know these things happen.


so he died when they left vs the whole family dying...........this was really an awful tragedy but it sounds like they were going to all die anyhow and this did not happen because the child was irresponsible, it was a timing thing--just like being in a plane crash or car accident would be.....

I am just posting this poll to see (since it is anony) how many parents have faith in their kids at that age or not and how afraid they are of other people's views 

Mojo --- 11 years ago -

My son has been staying on his own for short stints for about a year now. But, I really think it just depends on the kid. My son is not the impulsive type, he's very much a rule-follower and the worst thing he'll do is eat too much junk when we're not there.

So, in that case, yes, but its really very dependent on the child. Some kids are ready by 10 or so, but some kids aren't even ready in their 20's. 

a3569571uu --- 11 years ago -

So true Mojo, some kids are still kids well into their 20's LOL!! 

lovinmelife --- 11 years ago -

so he died when they left vs the whole family dying...........this was really an awful tragedy but it sounds like they were going to all die anyhow and this did not happen because the child was irresponsible, it was a timing thing--just like being in a plane crash or car accident would be.....

WOW...Really Kristen that is just a jerk thing to say... He died because he was a CHILD too scared to come down the stairs. Had an adult been home they could have helped him. They live outside of town so it takes the Fire Dept a bit to get out there. Firefighters said the only reason they can give for his death in the fire is he got scared and stayed in his room when they got to him it was too late. He was taught by his parents exactly what to do if the house had a fire..They were the family who did practice firedrills...bottom line is he was a kid and sometimes simply due to being a child they panic and get scared.

I do think kids need to be prepared for the world..I think every child is diff and it is up to the parents like I said before. But as a mom if there is a 1 % chance my child would be hurt or worse because i need a few min run around alone I am not willing ro risk it. We just had a girl almost taken here locally less than 4 mo ago so it does happen..an usually to the people who think it never will.... 

Charity --- 11 years ago -

that being said the girl knew what to do and was prepared and wasn't taken..things are going to happen in life that parents cannot be there every step of the way they have to learn some life experiences..hmm leaving a teenager alone and expecting them not to eat because they could choke with no one home..its just a matter of how protective of a parent and how much you teach and prepare them for..I go to the basement to do laundry but am in the same house..is that leaving them alone?? it also depends on peoples definition of leaving them alone.. 

Milly --- 11 years ago -

My 9 year old stays at home alone, when I take the dog for a quick walk. 

Kristen --- 11 years ago -

I really did not mean it to sound jerky. When something like that happens it is just bad luck I think. I did not wish it on them or anything 

Rachel --- 11 years ago -

Our children are MUCH more likely to die in a car accident- yet none of us are walking everywhere cuz of that. We accept the risk as a necessary part of living. I think the argument here is about whether or not risks associated with children/young people being on their own are necessary... 

Mojo --- 11 years ago -

I try to find a good balance between keeping my child a child, and making sure that, as he grows, he learns to become more self-sufficient and take care of himself.

My end goal is to send him out in the world equipped to take care of himself and be successful. I think this next year will be him learning how to help shop for groceries, and laundry. (until now he's not been able to reach the bottom of the washing machine lol)

At the same time, I don't want him to grow up too fast. He needs to remember being a kid as fun and free from all the stress and craziness of being an adult.

I think generally, things are probably just as, if not more, safe than they were when I was a kid. I just think that we are bombarded with the worst stories and images, so it really gives you a feeling of living in an unsafe world. On a day-to-day basis, what really happens in your neighborhood? I know not all areas are created equal, but there are quite a few places around here that I wouldn't bat an eyelash to letting my son free range during the day in.

However, I think when it comes to being home alone, kids really need to know and understand what to do in an emergency. Who to call (and can they dial the phone), where to go, alternate escape routes, don't answer the door (mom and dad and emergency contact have a key) and only answer the phone if you see mom or dad or emergency contacts number on the caller ID. Stuff like that.

Also, no cooking while we are gone. Either we leave you something to eat, or you make a sandwich. No need to turn on the stove or anything like that. 

Blueser oO --- 11 years ago -

There was no choice for "No, but not because of what others may think" and also there were no ages as to what you are referring to as a 'child'. My husband acts like a child sometimes, but I feel safe leaving him home alone most of the time ;) 

lovinmelife --- 11 years ago -

My husband acts like a child sometimes, but I feel safe leaving him home alone most of the time ;)

ROFL :)
love it 

CMS --- 11 years ago -

I was not saying that I would not leave my kid alone until he is 18, but he would have to be of an age to be responsible. As others have said, it would depend on how long (just running the trash out or walking the dog?) and how old and mature the child is. I was left alone at around 11 or 12, and was a "latch key" kid at 13 when my parents were getting divorced. Hell, I generally had dinner on the table at 14 when my mom would get home from work. Did I do things I should not have done? Well, yes, lol. But, that is part of growing up. 

MAD4EUROPE --- 11 years ago -

I was babysitting for neighbor kids when I was 9-10, I am now questioning why we don't trust our own kids

Things were different back then, at least somewhat. I mean we still had bad neighborhoods and everything but people just looked out for one another a bit more. I used to watch my cousin and the next door neighbors kid when I was 7. I had to also come home alone from age 8+, do my homework, sometimes cook, wash dishes and iron my clothes for the next day. It was something that was expected and I HAD to do, no questions asked. But then again, I think it goes back to parenting and what you expect from your kids. I mean, I am not that old (born in 79) but that's just how it was waaaaaay back when! lol 

MAD4EUROPE --- 11 years ago -

My husband acts like a child sometimes, but I feel safe leaving him home alone most of the time ;)

HA, I don't! I come in yesterday and he's sitting in the middle of the floor with all his Yurt Brochures. He was so incredibly excited....I soooooo was incredibly not! 

Mojo --- 11 years ago -

lmao @ yurt brochures 

Kristen --- 11 years ago -

all very valid points.........

mostly I was getting at 'do you trust your own judgement with your kid' and if you do, would you admit that you do something that goes against the grain of what other moms JUDGE each other on?

for instance, I was relieved when I found out that some of my friends still let their PRETTY OLD kids sleep with them when dad is deployed........;) one even lets her teenage daughter sleep with her regularly while hubs is gone

that is just an example--it was like *wow* now I can share my little secrets with her too

it is all about the PPR I swear

it used to be just PR (politics/religion) but now it is all about parenting too as far as wars/judgements 

Mojo --- 11 years ago -

Moms can be very cruel to each other. It's almost disturbing, the lengths some people will go to in order to feel better about thier choices. 

Blueser oO --- 11 years ago -

for instance, I was relieved when I found out that some of my friends still let their PRETTY OLD kids sleep with them when dad is deployed........;) one even lets her teenage daughter sleep with her regularly while hubs is gone

I used to sleep in my mom's bed with her when I visited her from college (when she was single). She had a king size and we just have that sisterly relationship, it isn't weird at all :) 

lovinmelife --- 11 years ago -

I am a very open person...I feel comfy with all my parenting choices and never really care what others think. They are my children and I feel I do a great job. Not everyone will agree on parenting, each style is diff and each child is diff. Even in the same home one form of punishment may work for one kid and not the next. You will always find people who will judge you. Go with your gutt and have no regrets :)and those who do judge you are not really your friends anyway. 

page 1 2
Login to add your comments!

see more discussions about...

polls

Terms of Service - Privacy Policy - Ice Box

Ramstein Underground